New Year's Eve

All the pretty girls in their finest silk frocks and high heels, the men in their overcoats out on the streets, going to New Year's Eve parties. Such an optimistic sight.

Men's brogues/oxfords/jazz shoes

Still looking for them. I would wear them with tights and short skirts. And in the summer, with shorts but no socks.

In the search for personal style, I have started to mine the past for the things I used to wear before I had a lot of income at my disposal. These would be the looks I put together from thrift stores, and I mean real thrift stores. Not to be a snob about it, but vintage stores don't count. Someone else has already sifted through the smelly mess (and dry cleaned it, for God's sakes!) and hung it up nice and neat for you. I went into a vintage store once--couldn't even afford a cotton slip in the place. No thank you.

Ahem. What I was saying. Was. In the timeline of my personal style, I went from Converse shoes to oxfords sometime in college. It was a slight transition to less tomboyishness at the same time, as I started to show my legs, too.

Personal landmarks of style (ages approximate):
15....h-u-u-u-u-u-u-g-e Gap pocket t's. (by huge, I mean I wore L or XL and weighed ~82 lbs)
high school....shoes, no socks. shoes always came off in English class
16....black Converse sneaks
17...Birkenstocks
21....brown men's oxfords
21....the return of the skirt
23...tank top (for the first time!)

More recent changes, I'll post some other time. There was the first high heel, silk dress, non-sale item, etc.

Ooops! Almost forgot the reason for my post. The shoes I lost out on on eBay. I still cry.

Shoe love

The current crush. Marc by Marc Jacobs makes the best shoes. Girly, fresh, whimsical, and just plain cute. He was the cobbler of the glitter shoes this past summer.

Two style inspirations

Segolene Royal, the French socialist candidate for the presidency

Why: elegant and refined. girlish without juvenility. the perfect French "no makeup," luminous look. showing how to age gracefully (she's 52).




Sofia Coppola

Why: singlehandedly made flats chicer than heels. epitome of offhand cool. an unconventional beauty. (pictured on the set of Marie Antoinette)

Sales

So in mid-November, the summer things go on sale. Then the day after Christmas, there are some deep discounts for fall and winter.

I want to slow down the purchases and try to work out new outfits with the items that I have. These sales haven't helped too much in that endeavor. But luckily, at least they fell around my birthday and Christmas, so it wasn't too much impact on the pocketbook.

Happy Boxing Day!

Note to self: sales after Christmas.











I'm enamored with the idea of ankle straps. Although I've read that they make legs look stumpy because of how they cut you off at the ankle, I like the slightly retro feel of them.

Plain and oversized, like menswear.









Just a simple ol' mini.











I needed something to round out the order so that I could apply a coupon. So I added this pair. But while I like the idea of corduroys--so warm and collegiate--I always stop wearing them after awhile.





I saw a slim-looking shopgirl the other day in a pair of very well-fitted pants. And it occurred to me that it must be possible to find pants that are tailored in small sizes. Perhaps I had been looking in the wrong shops, at the wrong brands.

Striped mini dress

When I was about in the third grade, mini dresses had a revival. It was the first reapppearance of the 60s (I think we've since had at least one more). I myself had a pink and grey striped mini dress that I loved to death. It was about the prettiest thing I owned, which is why I often didn't wear it. It was too pretty for me.

For one of my research projects, I did a report on Evonne Goolagong, the aboriginal tennis player from Australia. I borrowed my brother's tennis racket and wore that mini dress as my closest approximation of a tennis uniform.

This dress from Velvet reminds me of that dress I had as a kid. It should be arriving in the next week or so.

On skiing

"I say beware of all enterprises that require new clothes..."
---Henry David Thoreau

Looking for

...an oversized warm sweater.

Returns

So many, it's embarrassing. Maybe the postal patrons will think I'm just a really generous person sending off Christmas packages, instead of returning what will be 8 boxes of crappola.

A few sights on the way to work

Red, torn flesh. A tendon connecting two bird feet. And a few steps away, another red ribbon tying together two matted, wet wings.

In the park, remnants of snowballs littered the lawn. A large snow sculpture of a dog faced the sunrise.

And when I came back home, the same sculpture, but with the head knocked off, by now melting as noon climbed higher.

Nothing really to connect these two images, nor to connect them to this blog.

They did seem, though, like a primal part of life, laid naked.

And the bird missing its body, and the dog, made me think of absent things. And how we try to but cannot ever clothe those things.

Waiting

notes to self. please ignore. it's rather shameful.

anthropologie...jeans
creatures of comfort...sandals, shorts
shopbop...pants, jeans
neiman marcus...mini skirt, silk top
nordstrom...boots (2)
la garconne...ballet flats

Record rainfall

The black galoshes should come in handy.

Repetto "Chignon" flats

I think gold can work as a neutral, just like grey and black and white. Especially as accessories, like handbags and belts. They add a little bit of color to an outfit, but still go with everything.

I love the grosgain ribbon that edges this flat. It's sweet but grown-up.

At last

The top that I have been stalking for a few months have finally been marked down to about 1/2 price.

This top reminds me of the silky, satiny material that you can find at oriental shops. I used to have a pair of kid's pajamas in this kind of material, complete with an arc of frogging that buttoned up one side.

More crap, incoming

Worishofer Red Slip Ons

...for summers. I think it would go well with a denim mini and airy white tops. Kind of casual, but still a little more neat and pulled together than Birks.


Levi's Capitol E Boyfriend Jeans

...I wear my oversized jeans more than anything else. I like the androgynous potential of denim.







Karen Walker high-waisted shorts

...my favorite color blue. And I think the little ties on the side add a touch of whimsy. I like Karen Walker, too. She has cool, understated clothes that don't announce designer. This looks like something you could find in a thrift store, if you only had 10 years to find it.





& Theory black wool pants, Seven for All Mankind slouchy jeans, Marc by Marc Jacobs boots

I fully expect (and hope) that I will be sending some back.

3.1 Philip Lim blouse

I covet this men's style button down. Normally I don't like button downs. They just feel too stodgey and ... well, buttoned up. But this is special, and alas, sold out.

I have a craving for men's-style clothing right now. Perhaps the sweatshirt got me kickstarted. But I want a pair of wide-legged trousers. men's oxfords. and this men's shirt.

Men's oxford shoes, II

I know exactly what I'm looking for now.

shapely
black
shiny/patent leather
men's style
dress oxfords

No to orthopedic.
No to German comfort.
No to Doc Marten.

The good and bad

So I think the main difference in how I approach fashion now as opposed to a few years ago would be that I put more thought and analysis behind what I wear and like. I save pictures that I come across and like on my computer, and I clip editorials from magazines that catch my eye. Then every few months or so, I'll open up that file and review some of those images. From that, I've come to figure out my style. To where, when I see cute things on the rack, I can now say to myself, "that's pretty, but not my style." Before, anything that I thought was cute was sufficient criteria to try on and buy, but not necessarily to wear.

In addition, I think I've become a smarter shopper. I analyze potential purchases for how they'll fit into my wardrobe. I imagine occassions and outfits that would justify the purchase. I also try to imagine how that style or material will hold up after repeated wears. And if I find myself imagining myself in that outfit...suprisingly, that means it's a no. If I have to persuade myself into it, it almost invariably doesn't work for me.

So a few random things I've learned:
* J.Crew is not good for accessories like scarves and slippers. These get nappy and piley after just a little bit of wear.
* Splendid, Ella Moss, Velvet and C&C--all those luxury tee companies--are actually worth the money. Kinda. If those things are on sale. The modal, lyocell, and other fabric blends actually make their basics drape well and hold up nicely.
* Buy in a color palette. Save prints for special items, like a pretty vintage blouse or a party frock.

Roll call

Back goes everything that came recently in the mail, except for the J. Crew basics.

Men's oxford shoes

I'm on the prowl for a pair.

I used to wear them in college, as part of an overall aesthetic: tee shirts, short shorts or skirts, and clunky shoes. It was partly coltish, partly androgynous, partly nerdy girl. I have a picture of me on the steps of the Arc de Triomphe, wearing just such an outfit. Perhaps in some way, it conveyed a sense of style. I remember being stopped 3 or 4 times during my visit to Paris by Parissiennes asking for directions.

Then I thought at some point that it was time for me to "grow up." And by grow up, I think I thought I needed to become more feminine. So away went the oxfords with no socks, and in came the ... Birkenstocks. Okay, so not much of a leap, but you have to remember I was a girl who wore overalls on a date.

Anyway, I want a pair again. I was inspired by the appearance of these old artifacts on the fashion runway (Karen Walker, top right, among others), worn in the way I used to. Kind of louche, defiant, and tomboyish.

J Crew Featherweight Layering Tees

I got 2 for $40. In grey and white cotton. And then another one in "sea salt" wool jersey.

Very comfortable and perfect for layering, or not, once I break the seam on the neck. I hate any sort of binding around my neck, except for scarves. Everything else makes me feel like I'm suffocating.

Her wedding

The brides wore a strapless white wedding gown and a burgundy beaded ballgown.

I wore a knee-length silk dress in a watercolor print. And a blue mesh jacket over that.

Bad weather, bad poetry

It's the season for wet, dragging hems.

Sleeping, the sound of rain.
Waiting, wondering whether to dress for rain.
Walking, to school, through puddles.
Home. Damp ankles.

Hello, world

I shaved my legs this morning. The hairs looked like clumps of seaweed in between the razor blades, waving under the stream of water.

Now I feel newborn.

Wedding

The boy likes the jacket!

uh oh! There goes my budget. Well, I still have a few more things coming in this week, and I'll be deciding between them then.

What does one wear to an outdoor wedding in Texas in November? I checked the weather report and it says highs in the mid-60s, and lows in the 40s.

So I'm thinking:
dress...silk or cotton, to the knee...yes
high heels...no (I'll sink into the dirt)
boots...maybe
flats...maybe
some sort of wrap or fancy sweater...yes
or, my long coat, left open...maybe
sheer hose...maybe

Uh oh

I think I actually like the Mint Cropped Felted Wool Jacket. Must canvass for opinions. I was hoping to be sending this one back.

Cotton tights

I'm reminded today of Ramona Quimby, scabby-kneed heroine of my youth, who was fascinated by the continually sagging pantyhose of her schoolteacher. She would watch the hose crumple around her teacher's knees and pool in a nylon puddle at her ankles as the schoolday wore on.

My black cotton tights made their first appearance today, too. They are thick cotton and long, and so they wrinkle a bit. Or rather, they "slouch," in the modern lingo, reminiscent of Prada's highly coveted stockings sent down the runway a season ago. (Of course, Prada would be the design house to give librarian, intellectual frump a sexy edge.)

So I'm rather pleased with the cotton tights. I'm pleased about standing quite literally between two disparate moments in my life, and seeing some continuity.

Roll call

Kate Spade sunglasses, with kelley green holder
black cotton tights
Zooey elbow-length peasant top
Zooey tank with ruched shoulders
Elevenses red corduroy skirt with military buttons

in the mail
Mint cropped felted wool jacket
Belle by Sigerson Morrison knee boots
Karoo cashmere dress
JCrew layering tees, wool jersey tee, and cashmere long johns


I'd like to be warm this winter...

Plainer and plainer

The older I grow, the more I gravitate towards minimalistic clothing with clean lines and muted, monochromatic color.

So no to patterns, ribbons, frippery of any sort in clothing.

Sweatshirts

I've avoided wearing these for most of my life. I've always thought them to be despairing, slobby kind of clothes. The kind you wear when you've given up on life or your looks, when all you want to do is stay inside all weekend eating Haagen Daz and listening to the rain.

Today came close enough. Rainy, wet weekend with the prospect of work and more work in front of me. So I pulled on the boy's grey sweatshirt (I don't own any myself, and his are nice and worn in). Lo and behold. I got compliments on the sweatshirt. Not from strangers, but nearby boys. From various strangers, though, as I later skulked through Nordstrom with all its highly coiffed women, I got scrutiny.

This situation confused me, so I asked the guys who complimented the sweatshirt. One replied that it's cute in the same way that wearing your guy's button down is cute. And the boy remarked that wearing something plain puts everything else in high relief. It's good to know that I could have avoided spending the hundreds of dollars I've spent so far, and just got down to Wal-mart and gotten a few Hanes Her Way.

(Not really. If we set as our standard, male approval, what bottom dwellers we would be.)

Shift

It's close to time to shift from wearing sweaters and a rain jacket to full-blown winter gear: wool coat, gloves, hat. Sheesh, it was cold tonight!

Boots & skinny legs

I've always had skinny legs. In middle school, I developed an extreme self-consciousness about them, and I never wore skirts for that reason. I didn't want anyone looking at my legs. When I worked as a door-to-door canvasser for an environmental group in Texas (babes in bear country), I wore jeans the entire long hot summer cause I wouldn't wear shorts in public. I actually didn't wear a tank top until I was 24. I basically wouldn't wear any clothing that would invite scrutiny of any sort.

Despite the fact that an ex used to call me "chicken legs," I don't care so much about the skinniness anymore. I'll wear skirts and dresses, anyway. But the skinny legs still get in the way of my finding the perfect pair of boots.

Boots are a tricky item of clothing. With the wrong details on a pair, and suddenly you're a cowboy, a butch lesbian, a hooker, or an inter-galactic space traveller. For me, though, the trickiest detail has been the circumference around the calves. They're always cut wide and so gap and flap around my legs. No matter the style of boot, I always end up looking like I'm wearing puddle jumpers.

So imagine my surge in optimism when I clicked on "Narrow Calves" in the boot guide on Nordstrom.com and a few options came up. My greatest hope comes in this form, on its way to me in black and brown and arriving next week.

Northwest

A few things I wear or do that seems to be typical for this area. Most of these things I wore before I moved here, but I guess we seek the environment where we can blend in. It's like camouflage, in a way.

* Birks
* hairy legs (though not in the summer)
* scarves
* rain jacket i/o umbrella
* layers
* natural fiber
* funky shoes
* covered up
* winter hats (Kangol cap, watchman's knit cap, black beret, wool hat)
* cross-body, messenger style bags

Changes to simple

I have 4 shopping bags of clothes that I want to try to sell. That sounds horribly indulgent, even to me, but I console myself with the thoughts of a friend who had 8 garbage bags of stuff for Goodwill that she found on her floor.

A few things that have changed about my style:
* darker colors like grey and navy blue
* plain colors instead of patterns (easier to mix and coordinate. looks more expensive even if it's not. chic.)
* simpler items with less embellishments
* layering
* skirts again
* "luxury" fabrics like cashmere, wool, and jersey cotton

The boy has remarked that these changes lets my body shape come through. I've gotten a few dresses lately that are very very simple. A swath of blue jersey with a belt, falling to the knee; a slip dress with a banded vee bodice. He was referring to these things.

I've been pondering how to dress for the winter without becoming total frump. My body doesn't have the kinds of curves that look good in a thick wool sweater. I tend to get swamped in them. So I suppose it's a simple minimalist style that might work for me.

A tiny bit

I did just a tiny bit today. And picked up two tiny things: a camisole made of blue shirting, and ruched under the bust; and a pair of blue and white plaid pj bottoms with a rainbow grosgrain ribbon tie.

Shopping alone

I went shopping by myself on Friday. It's been maybe more than a year since I've been shopping by myself. Oh, I might make it out alone to the Best Rabbit and Rodent House once in awhile to get hay for the pigs, or perhaps stop by TJ Maxx on the way back, but whenever I have gone on a shopping expedition, the boy has gone with me.

I would thread my way through the racks, he trailing after, to offer opinions and to hold the things I wanted to try on.

The boy, although he favors nerdly clothes for himself, had become quite a fashion consultant. He offered good opinions. Advice like "the proportion seems off," and "it's nice, but not special" would spring from his mouth. He was horrified that he had learned how to appraise clothing.

But on Friday, I went by myself. It felt strange. It was quiet, not having anyone to talk to, and I could hear the conversations going on around me. There was a gaggle of excited girls in Sephora, and a similar group, about 15 years older, in Anthropologie--both cliques were discussing what they were going to do that Friday night. I think the girls had a club to go to, and the women had a dinner party.

In the open shopping mall, I crossed under the awning to get to the Victoria Secret (another free panty coupon). Night time was coming on. The lights were twinkling, and the shop windows glowed.

It felt strange, like being single, alone, again. Like slipping on an old pair of shoes you haven't worn in awhile. Familiar, and almost comfortable. But not quite.

[photo: anthropologie website]

Rain

In the rainy season, which I'm in now for several interminable months, I regret the long hems of my pants. They drag on the streets, fraying, and by the end of the day, they are muddy and forlorn.

When will I be warm again? It feels like I'll never be warm again. My clothes are suited for different climes. One day I'll move and the place and my accoutrements for the place will correspond.

Pajamas

I did not wear pajamas growing up. I think that habit might be a distinctly middle class notion, this idea of wearing something completely different to bed, for the sole purpose of sleeping.

Instead, I wore whatever I changed into after school. Most likely, a pair of shorts and a tee shirt.

A few years ago, I asked for a pair of pajamas for Christmas. Actually...my memory has gotten muddy. It must have been about eight years ago (holy geee!). My sister--who could always be counted on to give slightly better things than what I wished for--got me a plaid flannel pajama set. The pattern was startling, but the fabric was warm, and we settled in nicely together.

So I know it's getting cooler once I start padding around in those pj pants again. The elastic is shot, so mostly I pad around the apartment with the pants hanging low, like a gangster.

Multitudes

Both



credit: first pic, newish model Cecelia
& second pic, a TFS-er

P.S.

BUT! Speaking of bar clothing. I just remembered. The guy to the left of us was wearing grubby blue Carhartt overalls. And, not only that, he was wearing them as actual workwear. Eventually, after talking to him a bit, we pinpointed the smell to have derived from close proximity to mulch.

Oh, which reminds me. I am coveting a pair of Carhartt overalls myself. Will probably mail away for one soon. Nice to be able to become sexless in one neat, fell swoop.

Bar rules

The other day, I ended up at a bar without really intending to. Which is to say I was not dressed for it. I had on, from the outside in and down:

navy blue cashmere hoodie
blue cardi
white sleeveless tee
pink pants
blue and yellow polka dot belt

I felt way too colorful for a bar. You do not wear pink pants to a bar.

I was not conscious of this rule until I saw myself in the foggy, pockmarked mirror in the lady's restroom, aka the seventh level of hell. The stall's doorlock would not latch, the wood construction was sticky (let's not even imagine why...very inconvenient when you have to brace yourself from falling over as you hover, drunk), and a strong malodorous smell lingered in the air.

But at least there was t.p.

When I returned to my seat, my beer glass had been refilled in my absence. "It's a miracle," I said.

Whirligig

I got a nylon messenger that has a huge knot with three fabric spokes going off of it. It makes me think of whirligigs.

How have I acquired such a fondness for silly, or perhaps on a good day, whimsical, clothing? Just in the accessories, though.

Chloe Patent Leather Platform Wedges

I dreamed of these shoes last night.

A little bit Japanese, fetishistic, and punk all at once. I dreamed I had these shoes, and the life to go with them.

Overheard at Loehmann's

Loehmann's is a discount department store stocked mostly with brand-name clothing. It's also well-known for its communal dressing rooms. Usually I bypass that and wait for a private dressing room. One, the four walls of mirrors creep me out. Two, I don't like being looked at. Three, I don't want to inadvertently see a middle-aged woman in a thong, as I did the previous time I went. Nothing wrong with being middle-aged, or wearing a thong for that matter. But I'd never seen a thong in real life on another woman, and the experience was a bit too much reality for me.

So I was trying stuff on in my dressing room, and I overheard the conversation going on in the dressing room next door. It sounded like a British grandmother taking her granddaughter out shopping. The girl emerges from the room and awaits approval. A pause, and then...

"Do you want my honest opinion? It seems to me that you're trying to go from sweatpants casual to a more sophisticated kind of casual. Things that you can wear when your boyfriend takes you to New York for the weekend."

"I don't wear sweatpants," she says defensively, "and we wouldn't go to New York." But at this point we're both listening to grandma because it sounds like she's been around the block.

"That's fine. Perhaps a nice brown turtleneck that you can pair with a knee-length skirt? What do you think?"

It goes on in that fashion. Grandma reminds her that everything she gets will be 20% off (Which reminded me of my own coupon that I'd left at home!).

I liked that interchange. It made me think of the small moments where women pass down knowledge and experience, one to the other.

Photo: Carinne Roitfield, editor of French Vogue, and her daughter

Post 200

First day of work today. And I wore my shirt inside-out. It was early, much earlier than I normally get up, the room was dark cause the boy was still sleeping, and I was late. So I pulled on whatever was on the floor and headed out the door.

Luckily, it wasn't really noticeable cause the tee shirt had raw edges anyway.

Aspiration

In my recent fashion adventures, I have come to think that clothing is mostly aspirational. Besides a few pairs of tee shirts and jeans, you don't really need much to get by in life. All the rest of it is, depending on your point of view, excess.

The excess, though, comes from the primary reason that people shop, I would say: aspiration. Through these extrinsic objects, people imagine their better selves reinvented through some bit of technology, clothing, perfume, or cosmetic that will define them to the world.

There are a number of theories that analyze the shopping phenomenon. One in particular summarizes what I find interesting about it.
1. Shopping as a staged experience, like a movie. Stores try to stage the shopping environment like a movie set, against which people rethink who they are and who they could be. The wood floors and panelling at J. Crew, for example, conveys an image of fresh-scrubbed American gentility, just as their catalogs convey an idea of halcyon youth. The company tries to project some sporting life that few actually have, but through a $40 polo, some can try to approximate. The things offered for sale are essentially just props.

The difference between reality and aspiration becomes painfully apparent to me when I sit at the central courtyard at the mall, as I have done a lot this weekend. I try to think of what I see before me as the pageantry of life, all these shapes and sizes of people. But mostly, it's depressing to see the soft, ill-formed bodies and the things that people acquire to disguise a quietly desperate life.

Perhaps this is projection?

I indulge in it myself, all the time. In my imagined self, I see myself wearing knee high boots and shorts skirts with whimsical little tops. Something strong, feminine, and willful. In reality, I dress pretty demurely, as much to disguise as to reveal.

There is a constant push-pull of wanting attention and rejecting it. I think every girl has to come to terms with it at some point. Women are called into their femininity by these (mostly male) gazes that let us know that we have an effect on the world, oftentimes before we are ready. But then, at some point, that gaze and the sense of power that comes from commanding that gaze becomes entrapping. I see so many women who orient, if not their lives, then at least their clothing around male approval. Often, I have thought it would be so nice to be able to pass through life with some degree of anonymity. To cut through the crowds unblinkered, unimpinged.

The end of it

Okay, I think now is the end of the shopping spree. Got to be, because reality sets in tomorrow. Work!

As it turns out, the cosmetic case from the Gap will carry on the ironic tradition of its predecessor. The pull tags on the zippers have the word "Love" inscribed in enamel.

Since I was at the shopping center, I also stopped by Anthropologie to peruse the sales racks. Balancing my Jamba Juice "Strawberries Wild" with Energy Boost in the crook of my arm (I figure I'll need that boost for my late night tonight, trying to remedy my procrastination), I found a few items for the wardrobe. One turned out to be half of the sale price marked, so it turned out to be 75% off the original price. I had been on the fence about it, but I am no longer.

I also dropped off my jeans to be altered. Call off the dogs--I found the perfect pair of denim a few weeks ago.

Cosmetic case

I've been using my mom's old cosmetic case for something like 10 years now. The plastic has rubbed off on the inside, and what remains is discolored by ointments of years past. But I like the design, a delicate and faintly oriental vintage floral pattern. I also enjoy the irony of the bag's name. "Amore," which I think is pretty droll, given the fact that the case (until recently) held my toiletries for overnighters.

But it may be time to replace this aging artifact. Perhaps with this one from the Gap.

Adrenaline

The girls at the Fashion Spot say that you'll know when you find a handbag that's right for you.

It's a response you'll have, much like falling in love.

Gryson Skye, in smoke

Notes from a suburban mall

Uniform: For girls, tight faded blue jeans and tight tee shirts. Some wore tank tops, the last of the season.

Insecurity: It's the ones who have bad posture and cast furtive glances around them. They trail after their friends and provide a backup soundtrack.

Town square: Where do you go to find a big congregration of people in the suburbs? These are the town squares, the downtowns of the suburbs. A pretty good mix of people in the malls. Too bad it's all centered around the activity of shopping.

The easiest way to make friends

...is to leave the dressing room carrying stuff. In this case, the dressing room at Macy's carrying the sweater and leggings. Suddenly, I was swarmed by SA's who told me I was so cute with my dress on, and what a lovely sweater I was getting, and oh, was I ready to be rung up? I even got a restaurant recommendation while I was at it.

Not to be snarky about it. I just thought it kinda funny to see the heretofore desultory shopgirls spring into action at the sight of a woman with things in her hands.

We all play this game, I suppose. I have a few agreeable responses canned and ready to deploy at the first sign of it. "Yes, it will make a good layering piece." "I think so, too." And always gracious and good enough: "Thank you."

Rampage

I went on one. Why? I started off so well, all environmental and diligent. The shopping spree all began with a stainless steel compost bin.

It looks kinda like this one from Target, but with a more rounded lid. I got the Storables one because the reviews for the Target one said that the lid often got stuck.

See? I even did research. I was being good.



The goodness continued when I got an ice tea maker for the boy, so he won't have to drink that Lipton stuff in a can. Cause I live in the Pacific NW, naturally brewed sun tea is not really an option, at least outside of 3 short months.
And then I had planned this morning to travel to Whidbey Island to join the kite festival. A nice, wholesome activity. But the boy and I were derailed because of a late start, which required us to eat on the road. But where at? Given the limited vegetarian fast food options, we decided to stop off at the mall to visit the Panda Express. I also had two coupons for freebies at Victoria Secret. And thus my downfall began.

What I got:
free panties, VS
free lipbalm (in lieu of lipstick, but still "Very Sexy" according to VS)
thermal cropped leggings
cashmere sweater
sheer white tee with beachy screenprint
Concrete, Vol 1 (graphic novel)
green-framed sunglasses

and yesterday:
3/4 sleeve white thermal henley
red leather bound journal

and online:
pretty nylon messenger (to be worn cross body)
wallet

and the day before:
black beach pants
silk dress
white shoulder bag
white ruched sleeve tee

The second of the returns

Going back
Theory handbag

it was stiff.

The first of the returns

Going back
...the two jersey tops from Active Endeavors

Cute things

Being in a profession that requires I get in front of people every day, and act the authority, I have become a more conservative dresser. I leave most of my cute things (overalls, glitter shoes, slip dresses, shorts, miniskirts, fitted tops, and all but the baggiest jeans) at home when I get dressed in the morning.

In the way that I dress, I try not to give the wrong impression. I try to place a distance between myself and my audience. So nothing too young, nothing too playful or sexy.

Then when the weekend comes, too, it feels like too much of a shock for the system--too much exposure, sometimes--to haul out and put on those cute things.

Eventually, that translates to less wear for the short dresses and colorful tops, and then the next time I go shopping, I'm less apt to buy these things.

I'm starting to feel a little stifled in the way that I dress, accordingly. My favorite things, I can't wear.

Wallet!!!

I found one, at last. It's a little taller than the last one, so I'm hoping that receipts will fit comfortably inside. It's bright pink leather with an attached keyring. I found it today at Urban Outfitters as I was making a return.

I really like the CDG one, but it's a lot more than this one. This pink one gives me time for stalking a sale for the CDG, and if it never does get marked down, I think this one will work out just fine.

Keeping track

So rather than trying to maintain a budget, I have decided to use my bank account as a way of watching cash flow. So I've moved some money around, and now my new goal is to maintain a certain number in the checking account.

I have a few things arriving over the next few days. I've been bitten by the shopping bug. I don't plan to keep most of it, but I figure I'll spread them out on the bed and decide once they arrive.

Anthropologie (store visit)
slouchy grey v-neck sweater, Karoo by Mark Eisel
black skirt with ruched detailing
black l/s shirt with ruching at bust
striped racerback tank
grey cord jumper with lace detailing
grey wool t-back sweater dress, Paul & Joe Sister

Saks
black glazed leather handbag, Theory

Active Endeavors
blue striped boatneck tee, C&C California
black v-neck s/s top

Anthropologie (online)
grey booties, Lulu Guinness
grey wool semi-pleated skirt, Twinkle
2 handblown glass birds, Toikka
leather satchel, Rebecca Minkoff

Rag Nation
jeans, Helmut Lang

eBay
bright teal tee, Karen Walker

Floppy, revisited

I went through three phases of floppy dressing.

1. High school. Doesn't every girl go through a big-clothing phase at this age. The body is changing, every one is looking, and we're not ready for our debut. So. Big tee shirts, about three sizes too big.

2. College. Still too skinny, I swathed myself in loose tees and long skirts with cottony folds. Overalls were also part of the uniform. The ex-boy told me that I should dress with volume to cover my body so that I would look more my age, rather than twelve. I guess that was good advice, although in retrospect I resent the hell out of it.

2.5. Between 2 and 3 there was a brief, confused attempt to wear shorter, tighter, faster (again, at the prompting of a different boy du jour).

3. That phase passed. Now I find myself returning to some of the same shapes and volumes as before. A little more streamlined and cleaned up, but still essentially the same. And now that I'm living in the smaller meridians, I layer a lot. In the winter, I sometimes have something like 4 or 5 layers on.

I got this jumper dress reminiscent of a beloved, ill-washed set that I had in college. The lace at the yoke is supposed to fold down, not stay up in a frill like in the photo.

I like this example of loose dressing from Preen, too. I think that's my style. Men, be damned.

Possible wallet

Comme Des Garcons
"Like the boys"

I need a byline

Like this one, from a TFS member, who describes her style as "lackadaisical coquette-ish tomboy chic."

Questions

Will it make at least two outfits with my current wardrobe?

Does it work with what I have or will I have to acquire additional things to make it work?

How will it look after a wash or two?

Most importantly, do I love it?

Cleaned out the closet

So now, in addition to a suitcase of clothes to bring to Crossroads, I also have two shopping bags of stuff to try to sell. I think I'll do that this weekend.

Shopping list

1. long sleeve layering tee
-- I got one from C&C California, but I think it might be too flouncy still. I'm thinking I should just get a tissue tee from JCrew and be done with it. The ballet neck one that the boy got me for last year's birthday has gaping holes at the seams, but I still wear it.

2. handbag
-- This is not a given. I don't know that I need a new one for the season, although I wouldn't mind one. I think I'd like one that's smaller and more casual than the one I got a few months ago.

3. sweaters in interesting shapes to layer over other things

4. sturdy but pretty shoes
-- I'm thinking of the Converse Jack Purcell shoes in white.

5. loose black layering tank

6. well-cut pants

Cause of this bird

...I put in an order. *sigh*

Okay, I lied

I bought stuff.

I'm so ashamed.

This, along with something else. I don't like the model's poses, and they're not too remarkable really, so I won't post the other one.

But I rather liked this top because it seemed kinda ballerina-ish to me. It wraps around to a low banded bottom, then flounces out.

(And it was on sale.)

Rubber band solution

I rather like my McGyvor-ed rubber band wallet. The only thing that doesn't work for me is how it doesn't hold receipts all that well. Maybe that'll be incentive to empty and organize receipts more often?

Hmmm. It's that or the red wallet/clutch thingey I ordered from Yoox.

Weather schizophrenia

Maybe schizophrenia is not the word. I'm talking about the strange turns of weather that causes people to under- or overdress. Today, I saw one woman dressed in a tank top and shorts while her friend wore a thick cotton sweater and jeans.

How do you dress for weather that starts out at 68 degrees and ends at a sunny 78?

My solution: change outfits two or three times a day. Which works fine since I'm always returning home between outings.

I suppose I could just carry a sweater, but summer is so short and so glorious here, I like to revel in it when I can in my skimpy summer duds.

I was just thinking this morning about how Texas had shaped my ideas about summer clothing. Usually I'm pretty modest, but in Texas, modesty falls to the wayside when the temperature rises. It's nothing at all to wear strappy tanks and shorty shorts--everyone else does too (especially on college campuses). But here, I sometimes feel like a floozy.

Although, the boy and others noted how scandalously the girls dressed when the dial rose to a record-breaking 100 degrees a few weeks back. Then girls wore bikini tops, see-through white dresses, and dip-dip-dipping necklines while walking around the main commercial district in my neighborhood. I didn't notice that myself, but then again, I am not male. Personally, I don't go to those extremes.

Revised wishlist

I'm refraining from buying anything right now. Maybe it's because we're between seasons and sales. I don't want to buy any summer clothes--it's just not practical where I live now, when it's already cold enough to wear my thin cashmere hoodie in the mornings. And it's too early for Fall, either to truly contemplate or to seriously acquire for. I'm no squirrel. Hoarding away for the winter has not worked out well for me. Buying in advance of necessity is a practice that I'm gonna try to abandon.













So that leaves wishing. I still want the Twinkle wool skirt. And I found a pair of fantastic grey suede booties and glazed leather handbag, too, from Lulu Guinness and Theory, respectively. The latter items I just find so slick and cool, but at this moment unnecessary. Would they fit into my lifestyle? Do I have a slick and cool life? I think not.

As Coco Chanel said, "elegance is refusal."

Wallet

Currently, I am using a yellow rubber band to hold my credit cards, cash, and receipts together. My keys are on a separate kewpie doll keychain, attached to a rainbow-colored velcro strip (originally meant to go around flapping pants legs when you bike).

What's the phrase the kids use these days? Ghetto fabulous?

Perfume

In college, it was my goal to find a perfect histamine-inducing perfume. I wanted it to be fresh and flowery, like walking through a meadow that makes you sneeze at every step. I found a pretty good candidate in Origins "Spring Fever." Even the name had the effect I was after.

I found a even better version yesterday. The limited edition "Grass" from Marc Jacobs. Just like a mown lawn, but with a few lighter notes thrown in.

But yesterday I was looking for something a little more grown-up and sophisticated. Enter Prada Tendre. There's patchouli and sandalwood oil in there (I admit it. I like those smells. So sue me. I came of age in Austin, world of hippies.), but it's not too overpowering. I like.

That anthropologie skirt

I still covet it. I think I must get it.

The styling on the runway is rather dumb, and I wonder if the whole egg-shaped silhouette is terminally trendy. But still I crave it.

Yoox searches

A.P.C.
Anne Valerie Hash
Ann Demeulemeester
Chloe
Clements Ribeiro
Dries Van Noten
Eley Kishimoto
Etoile Isabel Marant
Hussein Chalayan
Jessica Ogden
Marc by Marc Jacobs
Marni
Miu Miu
See by Chloe
Sonia Rykiel Paris
Theory
Vanessa Bruno

Color palette

Mostly...
> grey
> navy blue
> teal
> white
> black

To add contrast and "pop"...
> french blue
> yellow, faded
(more watery sunshine at the ocean than mustard on a corndog)
> brown
> grass green

In the back of my mind, when I'm shopping, I'm trying to stay within this color scheme. The key to having a more versatile wardrobe is having separates that can mix and match, in terms of proportions and color. So I tell myself, to dissuade myself from kaleidoscope patterns.

Proportion: I want most of my tops to end at about the hip area, since I hate to tuck in and I'm too short to wear longer. For skirts, I like them at the knee or a few inches above. Although, come winter, I might try to channel a little grunge circa 1990 with long, puddley, mud-colored skirts.

Colors: While I still am drawn to pretty things, I'm trying to think about the color palette before getting them. Will the color coordinate with other things in my closet? Will I need to buy something else to make them work? Do I love it?

Anthropologie wishlist

At some point, I will look back and be embarrassed that I had been so enamored of the things in Anthropologie. But for now, I turn my un-cynical eye to a few things on my wishlist, with their accompanying catalog copy.

Steeplechase Skirt

Folds of plush wool gauze create a quirky, egg-shaped silhouette. With side pockets and a self-belt. From Twinkle by Wenlan. Lined. Side zip. Dry clean. Grey. 17.5"l. Imported.

Summer Carry-all

Roomy and reliable, this soft pecan leather doctor's bag by Rebecca Minkoff is a sure-fire cure for the accessory blahs. Brass hardware. Canvas lining with pocket. Zip closure. 11"l, 16"w, 7"d. USA.

White Toadstool Study

Tricholoma fulvum, made of papier mache and real moss. 3"l, 2.5"w, 5"h. Brazil.

Back to school

When I was in middle and high school, my siblings and I would usually take one special trip to the mall to get back-to-school clothes. My budget was small--$100, and that would be for the whole year--so I chose my items very carefully.

Afterward, back at home, I would take days to decide on the outfit to wear on the first day of school. I would consider and reconsider, laying the outfit out on my bed. When the day finally came, it would be hard to sleep the night before, and I would wake with fluttering butterflies in my stomach. First days of school were all about this year being different...reinvention...and all the wishes and longings that I had (innumerable as a child) would come true.

I remember those clothes vividly. One year, my first day outfit even had a name. It was the "purple pantsuit." Purple polo shirt over purple cords.

I'd like to retain now that same attachment and care for my things as I had then, but without the sense of paucity.

Crap

I don't think I'm that much better at choosing stuff that I'll love for a long time. The stupid dresses I got at Forever 21? Most of them, I haven't worn. One I like, and the rest were filling a void. But I didn't love them then, and I hardly like them now.

Too many patterns. Too much texture. Too long. Too fussy.

And then all this other crap. I think I'll have to do a major DIY session and overhaul some stuff. And edit this stupid closet.

I need a girlfriend who can come over to the apartment, lounge on the bed, and offer opinions. I need a gf. Some things, boys can't help that much on. The boy isn't so bad at offering fashion opinions, but he doesn't have to wear this stuff. And he doesn't take it seriously.

Eck.

Twinkle by Wenlan

Some clothes make you think of a scene.

The coat makes me picture a grey stone building. Perhaps a library or a school building. Dripping eaves, gentle mist. Slow dusk. Armful of books and the concrete texture of the sidewalk.